I have been here since about the beginning of May and ever since then my opinion of the city has gradually decreased. Yes, the weather is gorgeous, yes, a lot of people are fit, yes, the beaches are stupendous, yes, there is a lot of diversity (and really really good vietnamese restaurants!)...
But beyond that, and the cool things about the city, there is a lot that has started to really creep under my skin far beyond my contorl.
For one, I come from the east coast with a midwest mentality I guess (liberal, open-minded, chill) -- Pittsburgh --;.
I find that yes, the stereotype about fake people in LA is overwhelmingly true, and even though a lot of people aren't, the fact that there are a lot of fake people overshadows the positivity.
Also, it is so crazy expensive and for me being a 20 year old college student I can't even move into an apartment and have to move "back in" with my parents (i used to go to college in florida but had to withdraw b/c it was too expensive.)
Also, the materialism. Don't get me wrong, I like to shop, but after awhile you feel like you HAVE to have a lamborghini, you HAVE to have the finest this, that, whatever. And truthfully, do we need it? No!
Also, it seems very difficult to meet people, and yes I have been trying a lot (I work 9 hours a week - that's all they give me - and I go to social things but I just haven't clicked with ANYBODY.)
I'm confused, lost, and feel like my dreams are slipping. Anybody else have similar stories?
Thanks!|||Marblebeach,
I'm confused, you say your from Pittsburgh, and yet you moved back in with your parents after returning from Florida?
So I guess they moved out here, and you moved in, do I have this right?
And then you went to florida, but moved back HOME because it was too expensive.
OK I think I've got that part, kinda sorta.
My ancestry goes back a mere 120 years, not like the eal natives, bot Cali is all I know so here are my hobbies over the years
Surfing, camping, skateboarding, BMX, moto-cross collecting rocks(mostly fossils collected locally), baseball cards, mad magazines stock car pit crew, collecting old diner plates, the list goes on and on.
this is just a drop in the bucket as to what you can do here, you are correct, this is the place to be, in my lifetime the population has quadrupled.
Here's the part where you stop reading: And in spite of all that is here, in spite of all that you can do for relatively cheap, in spite of the 14 million people that live here, all you can focus on are the ones who are in love with themselves.
You are a mere child at twenty. you should be waaaaay to busy to care one lick about what ANYONE else is doing, why? Because you are too busy having FUN
all of those hobbies I've done? I never mixed my friends from one group[ to the next, most I still keep in Touch with, and I expose my kids to as much as possible, sooner or later something sticks and then we run with that Idea
you can sit and snivel or you can join every group you can in college, sure there's weenies, sure theres folks who take themselves too seriously
If you are as liberal as you say you are, than show it, be wise, those people that upset you? they aren't any happier than you. Possessions do not a person make
When you can focus on what it would take to make you who you are, then those posers will fall away into nothingness|||Yeah I agree with you, I'm originally from Pittsburgh, been living in LA off and on for the past 8 years... Still am always happy to be back home in Pittsburgh.
I just guess where ever you were born and called home is the bar you compare other cities to. Sure LA has lots to do and see, but I've yet to be in a city that is as "comfortable" as Pittsburgh. Just different way of living and way of doing things.|||There are places in LA where everyone doesn't have to keep up with everyone else and not everyone on the street has a beamer. A couple of areas that come to mind are Long Beach/South Bay and Pasadena. Yes, you still need money but the majority of people in these neighborhoods don't flash it.
Good luck.|||LA is very diverse. If you aren't finding what you are looking for, you aren't looking in the right place.
Try to be yourself, and be natural. Don't have expectations. Have you heard the phrase "you find it where you least expect it"?|||I don't think you have given it enough time. You will adjust after a while.
Everyone has a lambo ?....Scheesch, I better run out and get one....|||just find good friends|||too hot for my liking|||I live in the South Bay, near Long Beach etc. There are TONS of things to do. Only "rich" neighborhoods have the attitude you're describing. Like Bevery Hills, Hollywood etc... That's NOT representative of most people or neighborhoods in California or Los Angeles, just like it's not "fair" to judge the "rich" neighborhoods near Detroit, Chicago, etc...
Affordable non-snobby neighborhoods include Monrovia/Duarte, east of Pasadena, Torrance which is west of Long Beach.
North of here is San Luis Obispo (my favorite area to vacation) with an incredible school Cal Poly.
I've been out of school for a long time so I cannot advise most affordable schools or student housing or apartments.
But stop judging everything based on Hollywood.
Most of us are just normal people with that great weather.
Try volunteering for a beach cleanup, a theater group etc... and you'll get a better flavor for things as well as meet "normal" people.|||You have only been here 3.5 months, that isn't enough time to give the place a chance. I didn't meet any decent people until I had been here 6 months. I also spent almost every weekend by myself sightseeing and getting to know my new city. That helped immensely. I think I know more and have seen more of California than the majority of people that live here.
My job transferred me out here 3.5 years ago and I don't find the people that much different than my hometown of Dallas. There are lots of fake-blond, overly silicone inflated, Botox injected, materialistic people there too.
It is expensive here. If I were to rent a comparable apartment to what I had in Dallas I would have to pay $2000 per month. In Dallas I paid $750 a month. Even though I make $20,000 more a year it's still hard to make ends meet.
Where are you going to meet people? Maybe that is your problem. Go to more low-key bars and not Hollywood or West LA. The beach cities are more chill than inland.
Fake, materialistic people are insecure people. They don't deserve your time.
What are your interests? Join groups online. If you like food or bars register on yelp.com. They frequently have foodie get togethers.
There is a Pittsburgh Steelers meetup.com group in LA. You can meet other people from the steel city in LA and commiserate about LA.|||I moved to LA from Vancouver in 2001 and I got used to it in about 5 minutes.
Mind you my daughter went to high school and went to Pittsburgh to go to college. Pittsburgh is a lot nicer than people think it is. However she is returning here for her doctorate.
Here, you do have to get used to everything being so spread out compared to Pittsburgh. In Pittsburgh in 30 minutes, you can get from Monroeville to McKeesport. In LA, in 30 minutes you ar ein another neighborhood that looks just like the one you left.
You do have to scale back your expectations on living quarters here. Most college students live 2 or 3 to an apartment here.
If you want to meet people join some clubs. I met good people joining Toastmasters. And Toastmasters is cheap.
As for the materialism, I do not know where you are getting that from. I have been here for 8 years and I drive a Ford Focus and an very happy with it. My daughter, who went to high school here is quite happy with a Chevy Cavalier. Sure there are some people with expensive cars. So what?|||You should have asked before you moved here. Here is an excerpt of what I tell people who ask about LA:
For a number of reasons, we get a bunch of questions asking what it’s really like in SoCal.
First of all, I'll tell you what it's NOT like: It's not like anything on TV. People watch shows on TV and think that’s what it’s like out here. The “Real OC”, Newport Beach, The Hills, etc. Ever wonder why people in those shows never have to pay bills, do laundry, and are NEVER stuck in traffic? Because it’s FAKE. And the news doesn’t help either, since they know that sex and sensationalism sells. News flash: There aren’t running gun battles in the street. There aren’t shootouts every day. Also, you don’t see celebrities just walking down the street, all glammed up, or sipping a cappuccino at Starbucks waiting to sign autographs. We don't go surfing during lunch hour.
Some sections are REALLY nice, others are “ghetto”. Too many people have this vision in their head that LA and Orange County are one or the other (either Beverly Hills or Compton). They either think it is a fairy tale fantasy or an apocalyptic ghetto. In fact, most of it is working class and middle class stiffs working to pay the bills. Like me.
Yes, gas and real estate are very expensive in SoCal. However, this would be the best time to BUY a house because it's a buyer's market right now. There are a lot of foreclosures, and too many houses on the market. If you want to rent, figure on $1200 per month for a 1BR in a decent neighborhood. You need to make about $30,000 per year in order to do that. You can't do it on minimum wage.
Yep, freeways are a drag, it's smoggy in summer, and expensive to live here. Yet, if it's so bad, why do we have thousands and thousands of people moving here? Weather, year-round activities, jobs, beaches, mountains, and deserts all within driving distance, and plenty of opportunity for those who have the skills and tenacity.
However, it is not for everyone. Every time someone posts this question, you get the LA haters who post their bile and venom. A lot of them don’t know what they are talking about. Some people never even visit, and hate it on principle and stereotypes. Some actually visited once, and found out it wasn’t like it was on TV, and it certainly wasn’t Mayberry. And some actually lived here, and couldn’t deal with the expense, the traffic, or the somewhat impersonal nature of living in a large metropolis. To those I would say “good luck” to you wherever you are, but please don’t spew your hatred in this forum.
More about “casual indifference: Most people here have cinder block fences between houses. In other parts of the country, you sometimes have no fences at all! It’s just the lifestyle here: People want their own private space. It’s sort of “you do your thing, I’ll do mine”. I wouldn't call people here "fake". I think "superficial" is a better descriptor.
To summarize, it’s a HUGE metropolis that really defies easy description. I live in one of the nicer suburbs, but the commute is no fun, often 1-2 hours each way each day. However, 340+ days of sunshine really helps. Yeah, it's expensive. Mrs. Obviousman and I both have to work to pay the mortgage. But is it worth it? Absolutely! But before you move here, you have to have a career already started, or live with a relative. Real estate is too expensive.
As for the materialism, it only gets to you if you let it. I don't know what pressure you're feeling. Personally, you don't HAVE to have the latest and greatest. I've driven the same car for 16 years now, getting close to 300,000 miles. Go Chevy!|||So many people come here with a pre-conceived idea for what LA is like, and when those ideas don't jive with the reality ... it's a bummer.
After re-reading your paragraph, you're awfully negative, hon. Will you re-read your paragraph, only pretend that you don't know who wrote it?
(pause, while you read it .... it's ok. I'll wait.)
What do you think of the person who wrote it, now?
My best advice to you is to try something that you haven't tried before. Not knowing what school you're attending or what part of town you're in, or whether you have a car to get around, it's hard to suggest anything. Just keep this firmly in mind: In order to have what you've never had, you have to do what you've never done.
Be yourself, but be better. Get the gray cloud from over your head, and start with YOU. What kind of day do YOU want to have? Screw anyone who thinks that anything less than a lambo is sad, ok? They're just snobs, and not worth your time. There ARE real people who don't care what's in your bank account.
Best of luck !!
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